| "Flight 1234, are you
ready to copy
holding in... | "Flight 1234, for noise
abatement turn
right 4... |
| "Hello flight 56, if you hear me rock your
win... | "I've never flown before, said the
nervous old... |
| "Should the cabin
lose pressure, oxygen
masks ... | "This is Captain Sinclair speaking. On behalf
of... |
| A
blind man was describing his favorite
sport,... | A blonde gets
an opportunity to fly to a
nearb... |
| A blonde gets on an airplane and sits down in
th... | A few days after Christmas, a
mother was
worki... |
| A husband suspects his wife is having an
affai... | A little guy gets on a plane and sits next to
... |
| A man is flying from Los Angeles to New York.
... | A man jumps out of an airplane with a
parachut... |
| A man named Mr. Smith was
flying from San
Fran... | A man telephoned an airline office in New
York
... |
| A man walks up to the
counter at the
airport. ... | A military cargo plane, flying over a
populate... |
| A mother and her son were
flying
"Southwest Ai... | A pilot and a co-pilot were descending for a
lan... |
| A pilot and a co-pilot were descending for a
lan... | A plane was taking off from Kennedy Airport.
A... |
| A plane was taking off from Kennedy. After it
re... | A small twin-prop
commuter plane was
hijacked ... |
| A small two-seater Cessna
152 plane
crashed in... | A student was heading home for the holidays.
Whe... |
| A woman called and said, "I need to fly to
Pepsi... | A young and foolish pilot wanted to sound cool
... |
| A young guy in a
two-engine fighter was
flying... | A young guy in a two-engine fighter was
flying
... |
| A young lady was conducting a study in to
human ... | According to "The Australian," an airliner
recen... |
| After a real crusher of a landing in
Phoenix, ... | After an overnight flight to meet my father
at
... |
| After the first
takeoff of the fully
automatic... | After the first
takeoff of the fully
automatic... |
| Air Force One crashed in the middle of rural
A... | All of these pilot and aviation jokes get me
t... |
| An
airline pilot wrote that on this
particular... | An
employee of USAir with the last name of
Gay... |
| An airline captain was breaking in a very
pret... | An airline pilot was scheduled to take a
flight ... |
| An airline pilot wrote that on this
particular... | An airline stewardess was giving the standard
... |
| An airliner was having engine
trouble,
and the... | An airplane pilot dies at the controls.
He goe... |
| An airplane was flying from LA to New York.
Abou... | An airplane was losing altitude
over the
Rocky... |
| An award should go to the United Airlines gate
a... | Another flight
Attendant's comment on a
less t... |
| As a crowded airliner is about to
take
off, th... | As a Delta Air Lines jet was flying over
Arizona... |
| As migration approached, two elderly vultures
... | As the airliner was preparing to land in
Madri... |
| At one of the packed, Delta ticket counters
all ... | At the airport for a business trip, I settled
... |
| ATC: "Cessna G-ABCD What are your intentions?
" ... | Aunt Bessie loved to visit her nieces and
neph... |
| Aunt Bessie loved to visit her nieces and
nephew... | Bill Clinton,
Hillary Ramrod Clinton, Al
Gore,... |
| Brendan had spent a week
visiting his
family i... | Cessna: "Jones tower, Cessna 12345, student
pilo... |
| Delta Airlines recently
introduced a
special h... | During the heat of the space race in the
1960's,... |
| Ever wonder why they never show the film ALIVE
... | Flight fifty
has a pretty rough time
above the... |
| Flying to Los Angeles from San Francisco the
oth... | Fred and his wife Edna went to the state
fair ... |
| From a
Southwest Airlines employee: "There
may... | From a Southwest Airlines employee....
"Welcome ... |
| From the pilot during his welcome message:
"We... | How does the captain know the aircraft is
safely... |
| How does the captain know the aircraft is
safely... | How many pilots does it take to change a
light
... |
| I have a friend who is a pilot on a
747.
I sa... | It was a few days before Christmas. The trip
wen... |
| It was mealtime on a small airline and the
fli... | LH741: Tower, give me a rough time check
Tower... |
| Little boy to airline pilot:
"You're
a pilot... | McNally was taking his first plane ride,
flying ... |
| Michael Jackson, Bill Clinton and Nelson
Mande... | No flight ever leaves on time unless you are
run... |
| On a flight
with EasyJet back in 1997 the
pilo... | On reaching his plane seat a man is surprised
to... |
| Once as Laloo was coming out of airport,
there w... | One day at a busy
airport, the passengers
on a... |
| One day at a busy
airport, the passengers
on a... | Overheard on an American Airlines flight into
... |
| Part of a Flight Attendant's arrival
announcemen... | Passengers on a Lufthansa flight heard this
an... |
| Pilot says:
"Folks, we have reached our
cruisi... | Pilot: "Jones tower, Cessna 12345, student
pilot... |
| Pilot: Tower, please call me
a fuel
truck.
T... | Pilot: Tower, there's a runway light
burning.
... |
| Southwest Airlines makes humor a high
priority... | Stewardess"
"Yes, Sir?" "I want to
complain ab... |
| Taxiing
down the tarmac, the jetliner
abruptly... | Taxiing down the tarmac,
the jetliner
abruptly... |
| The Captain was
Jewish, and the new First
Offi... | The German controllers at Frankfurt Airport
we... |
| There were three guys in an
airplane. One
guy ... | Tower:
Have you got enough fuel or
not?
Pilot... |
| Tower:
Mission triple-three, do you have
probl... | Tower: Cannot read you, say again!
Pilot:
Agai... |
| Tower: Hawk 20, is this the same aircraft
decl... | Tower: Lufthansa 893, you're
number one,
check... |
| Tower: Shamu two-two, please
state
estimated t... | Tower: What's your heigth and
position?
Pilot: ... |
| United
Airlines FA: "Ladies and
Gentlemen, as ... | USAir recently introduced a special
half
fare ... |
| What is ideal Flight Deck complement for a
mod... | While cruising at 40,000
feet, the
airplane sh... |
